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TOPIC: Hello From New Jersey
 

HPVFD99
Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 6 Months ago
Hi Everyone, I am 25 years old from New Jersey and my girlfriend and I are expecting a baby in a little under 9 weeks now. I am looking for some good advice on what to expect in the next few weeks to come. We own a business and are moving into a new home, so we have a lot going on in this special time in our lives, an good suggestions and or advice?
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Fulline
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 6 Months ago
Hello,

I'm a new member here, a father to be (due Oct. 25) and also live in NJ (Bergen Co)

I can't offer you any advice as I'm in the same boat as you, so ill just piggy-back and hopefully someone with more experience can help both of us out.
Don't mean to be nosy, but just curious what kind of business you are in.

Looks like you are doing good for yourself...your only 25 with your own business and moving into a new home.
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ProfJJ
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 6 Months ago
Hey, I'm a soon to be dad in NJ as well (about 2 weeks away)... But I have been hosting my sister and her kids (7-4), who live out of the country most of the year and stay with us for long stretches, so if you live anywhere near Northern Jersey (I'm in Morris County) I might have a good list of fun places to bring your kid once he/she arrives.

Sorry I don't have any practical advise for you for the next few months, but I'm right there with you, and I'll be snooping on your post to see if anyone gives you something good.
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Daddy Clay
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 6 Months ago
Welcome. Glad to have some expecting Dads from the NJ here at DadLabs. One nice thing about the DL, we've been adding to the site for several years now. The result is that there are hundreds of videos, blogs and discussions all about being an expectant or new dad.

The best way to get info here may be to search specific questions or problems. There may be a video or a discussion already underway on that subject. If there isn't, you can suggest that we make a video on that subject, or throw your question out to the community here.

For expecting dads in general:

-rest up
-don't expect things to be perfect
-enjoy being just a couple for a while
-remember that babies grow up REALLY fast,and it gets easier

I hope that you find some useful info here. Don't be shy. Post questions!
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Gabriel Stein
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 6 Months ago
Hi guys,

Seems like there's a lot of soon-to-be dads coming from New Jersey. I grew up in Cranford and went to Rutgers. I currently live in Sweden. I have two kids, 3 and 7 months, and I just started my first day of being on paternity leave with my son Herman. I'll be off with him for six months. Pretty amazing!

For whatever it is worth, here's a little advice that I've learned along the way:

1. Be the coach during labor. Give her tons of water. Say every ten minutes, "Baby, the pain means we are getting closer to see our new baby. You're doing a great job."

2. Little things matter. Cook a dinner for your wife both before and after the birth.

3. Before the kid comes all you think about is the birth. Afterwards it's like you have a new life, and the birth doesn't even matter anymore.

4. This one is probably the hardest to master for us men, and I'm still trying. Be in the moment with your kids. There are some days when I'm too busy or wrapped up in my own business. It's not always easy changing diapers, feeding kids, and doing all the stuff that is real monotonous. But I always try to think of the day when I'm 60 years old and thinking back on my life. I'll have wanted to be in the moment, loving my kids and being with them as much as possible.

5. The first few years with young kids put a lot of strain on a marriage. Go with the flow and know the tough times will pass.

6. Have fun.
Last Edit: 2010/08/14 22:46 By Gabriel Stein.
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Daddy Troy
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 5 Months ago
Welcome HPVFD99
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jamec9869
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 4 Months ago
Hi! I've just visited this forum. Happy to get acquainted with you. Thank
Last Edit: 2010/10/14 16:44 By Erica.Reason: Remove link
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pfanndad
Re:Hello From New Jersey
1 Year, 3 Months ago
Yet another NJ Dad here. Monmouth County.
We have two (1 and 2 ) and another on the way,
so while I have experience, I am also an expecting Dad again.

Gabriel gave some good advice.

What I'll add is that the first few month change soooo fast.
At the beginning it's eating/pooping/sleeping.
Followed by eating/pooping/sleeping/crying.
Then eating/pooping/sleeping/crying/looking around.
Then it gets interesting... for everyone.

They don't do much early on and they stay where you put them so enjoy that phase while it lasts.

Your schedule is going to be totally disrupted.
Get used to that idea and get used to waking up multiple times a night.
One of the things my wife has appreciated most with overnight feedings was having the baby changed for her and getting her food/drink while breast feeding.
I've heard of lots of guys who sleep through night feedings and I don't understand how they justify that lack of support.
The 'fourth trimester' is hard (harder than pregnancy) and the best way to get through it is together as a team.



Good luck and enjoy.
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