hey everyone, i have a problem lol (many) and i don't know what to do. I love my girl, more than i have any other but sometimes i feel like i'm not being myself with her. With other women i never allowed them to get me upset or make me feel a certain way but i guess since i've allowed myself to feel more than ever (first time in a while), ima have to deal with my emotions. I sometimes think i'm too nice or i'm too willing to not fight and just keep things to nice or happy because my girl has a way of breaking down my walls and touching my nerve. I've been more emotional during the past 10 months to a year than i have in my whole live. I sometimes think she doesn't care whether she hurts my feelings or not. And my anger and the dick i can be wants to flow and takeover. I try to pretend like i dont hear of like i dont know whats going on. I dont want to treat her like i would treat the rest. I dont know how long before i just completely let go and just release myself.

Just to be fair I know i do things to annoy and frustrate her so I am definatly part of the problem.

Tough situation.

Hmmm... I want to be the safe lame-O who says you two need to get some professional counseling. Because an expert in these situations can help you BOTH see what's going on and help you get to the root of the problems, AND give you ways to fix it. Addressing them BEFORE the stress of baby care magnifies everything is a good idea.

BUT, I also know that alot of what said expert will give you is common sense, of which you seem to have going for you (many MANY people do not) just by you recognizing your own emotions and reaching out to a Dad forum...

SO... First, you've GOT to communicate. And I mean for real, not just pushing buttons or reacting to buttons pushed. Gotta let her know when somethings not right. And she needs to let you know. You've got to find a way to express yourselves without the arguments, otherwise it'll just get worse.

Now you CAN try to just suck it up and deal with the bullchit and let it slide over and over... but I think you already realize that's gonna blow up in your face eventually. I think it's GOOD that you recognize that now.

Pick your battles. If it's unimportant, it's unimportant! Let it go. Don't just bottle it up. Let it go. But if it is important, say so.

There's another thread where I gave some personal examples here: www.dadlabs.com/forum/Lounge/Wives/Partn...uff-unless.html#9015

Good luck! Thanks for sharing.

John I would have to agree with nik. Sometimes we need to be that bigger man and go get help with our problems. I also agreee very much that you and your girl need to talk, no not just day-to-day talk but really talk. Trust is a HUDGE part of making it work, finding that one person you can let your guard down with is the sweetest thing in life. If she really is "THE ONE" then she will return in the same manner. I did the same as you have in the past, just bottle it up or push her buttons to get my own way. More times than I wanted it ended very badly. Make the time to talk to your girl, it is the best for you both and the problems that WILL come.