And when I say "value" I mean in both senses of the word. How important to your family is stability in career, home location, schools, etc.? Have you ever had to actually quantify stability? What is the price you put on stability?

The subject is on my mind as a number of friends have recently announced a change in career and/or a move. It has my wife and I talking a lot about the choices we have made. I'm wondering if you've had similar conversations.

Very highly. Raising kids seems like enough of a challenge as it is. I can't imagine trying to make a peaceful daily family life while shuttling around between interviews, sending out resumes, and so forth.

I'm a bit of an outlier when it comes to job stability. I've been with the same company for 17 years. What's more, I work in IT - even during the boom years of the 90s/y2k era, I chose the stability of staying with the company, rather than chasing raises/bonuses which could be had at that time by job hopping.

That is probably pretty extreme by most people's standards. It's just my personality, I guess. I've been lucky, in that I work for a large, stable company which caters to that lifestyle choice.

I most definitely value stability. Daily things I can "count on" (be it bad or good) keep life tolerable for the things I can't control. (Like cat puke, always gonna be there, but it means my old cat is still kickin'... bad drivers, I expect them, and this means that I have and can afford a car to shuttle my family... Focus on the positives.)

My job, is fairly easy at this point. Predictable, has great benefits including intangibles like nearby and very flexible. I have no intentions of leaving it anytime soon. My car, is in relatively good shape, and I don't have to think about it much.

When something upsets the 'normal' routine, it makes me, let's say, anxious. (Like a car wreck or unexpected repair.) I've learned to stop and breath and focus in order not to really wig out. I sincerely credit my divorce (12 years ago) for teaching me to 'use my neurosis' to my advantage. Refocus and concentrate on what's REALLY important, at that particular moment, in the next few hours, days, weeks, etc. I still lose it sometimes, but I often say "Life is grand." And it's grand because of the constants in my life. TheBoy, HisMother, Home, Brothers, Career, Skating, etc.

We have been discussing, really threatening ourselves with a major upheaval to Indianapolis or Columbus for about 3 years now... we simple can't afford it. So I have not wigged out about it, because it's not "real" yet. The minute it becomes real, is when my blood pressure will sky rocket and I'll go nutz with all that has to be done, let alone the worry of "Now what? What's next? What if?" Career changes and household moves are MAJOR disruptions. But they can also be wonderful opportunities.

I would take adventure (for lack of a better word) over stability any day.

I need to get out and see what the world looks like, see who the people are, what the cultures are like.

I need to be able to look at a map and know what the topography feels like, I have a need to be able to relate to that area. Sounds fluffy, I know, but I can't help it, that's how I'm wired.

Looking back on it, I realize that my relationships with women only lasted 6 mo to 2 yrs depending on how long things could stay fresh and exciting. I'm not talking about just in the bedroom, I mean getting to know someone and experiencing the synergy and the relationship itself. And the next girl was always very different from the last.

I'd return "home" to find that all my old friends wanted to talk about was getting "Lawn of the Month" and how their new SUV has "wind noise" and what a deal they got on the new $3000 couch. I just couldn't relate.

I've driven through every state in the country, 5 Canadian providences, criss crossed Mexico a few times, worked and/or went to school on four different continents, kayaked both sea and white water all over North America and Europe, and driven and camped in my 4x4 camper van in some of the most remote locales in the US.

Finally I figured I found the right woman, the right place, the right job, and the right time and have settled down and got some stability in my life where I can still get out and recreate on a daily basis if I really need to.

But the monotony that comes with the stability is driving me crazy. I've lost my mojo and feel like the Mars rover, dead in the sand. We still get out and travel, but it's not the same.

The topic is on my mind because a few close friends are making career/life changes and my wife and I have been having those "should we be more ambitious" conversations.

The next step for my wife's career would definitely entail a move. I think she feels like it is something she "should" do, but when she really starts to break it down -- to look at the real lever of pros and cons, the idea gets dropped pretty quickly. There will be time for her to take that next step when the kids are older.

Being a military family, "stability" is a relative term for us. I would absolutely love to be able to stay in the same place for an extended length of time. I'm currently waiting to hear back on where my next ship is going to be stationed, and I'm praying for San Diego because we've lived here for the past year and that would give us another 3 here. 4 years is an incredibly long time for us to stay in one place.

In fact, we are so unfamiliar with the idea that if we stay in the same place for more than 6 months, we start to get really antsy. Usually, we can just rearrange the furniture or something and it gives us the feeling that we have "moved."

I guess the answer to your question is that I value it very highly in the sense that I would like to give my kids a few years in the same school (or at least the same district). I can't actually put a monetary value on it though since that would be a battle in futility. I will never be given the choice between more money and more stability, so it would just be a purely academic exercise anyway.