My wife's mother backhandedly accused us of preventing our son from having a childhood at a whopping 8 months of age.<br><br>What set this up was that Deborah, my wife, signed Duncan up for early swimming lessons at the Y, which we joined to get him indoor exposure to swimming. Now, starting at 6 months, they have a class that is a basic introduction to being in water. It's not swimming as such, but it teaches them that they can be safe and shows parents how to make it safe. Somehow, this activity is robbing our son of the opportunity to do things he wants to do. I just don't get it. He's 8 months old.<br><br>Our reason for getting him into this class is simple. The In-Laws have a cottage on a lake and we go there on occasion. We'd prefer that Duncan be relaxed around the water and possibly even know what to do when he first experiences being in a water beyond a bathtub, be it on purpose or from some accident. But in a couple years, we'll expose him to things like soccer and painting and books and story time at the library and maybe a puppy. In fact in a month or so, he and I are going to go to one our city park rec centers for a chance for him to paint along with a handful of other pre-toddlers.<br><br>We don't see these things as limiting him but as giving him more ways to interact with other kids and try something new that we don't need to clean up. We don't expect to sell his first painting for a million dollars on eBay and we won't be trialing him for the Olympics in three years. He's 8 months old. To me it seems liberating. But I was raised latchkey from age 7 by parents who worked from 6am to after 10pm. My wife's divorced parents left her in a similar situation to make ends meet. Her father condemned all team sports as evil and individual athletics as elitist. I don't agree with the way they did things but I also don't think they made wrong choices. We're all affected by our situation.<br><br>Is my perspective skewed? Maybe all the rage is that sedentary lifestyle we've spent millennia perfecting?

That's a really bizarre thing for your MIL to say. I would not have any second thoughts about what you're doing...I totally agree with you. Getting the kid out there and participating in stuff outside of the house as early as possible is critical in my opinion. It's these early months and years when the neural networks in the brain are still forming, and they need as much sensory stimulus as possible. Sounds, new physical sensations, messes....all good. Very good.

What he said. Smile & Nod at the MIL... then do what YOU feel is the right thing for your family. Don't make a big deal out of it, but 'taint her decision.

Well if it comes up again, we'll go TeePee her house. Who's in?

Get that kid in the water! Swim with him constantly. Love that. Good in more ways than I can think -- from a safety perspective, from a health perspective. Getting them involved early means the sooner you don't necessarily have to be in with them every second. In three years, you'll be on the side of the pool watching your tadpole, while all the other parents are in up to their armpits supporting junior bobbing around with the water wings.

That's just nuts, swim, swim, swim.

Some of my favorite childhood memories are of my father taking us out for fun and BBQ at DuBois park, which is a small beach area type park in south florida. We'd not have been able to do this safely if we didn't know how to swim.<br><br>Growing up in S. Florida, many people had pools, and obviously we went to the beach a fair amount...more so when I was younger than when I was a teen. Couldn't have done these safely either if I didn't know how to swim.<br><br>I don't recall ever taking formal classes (though I certainly may have at a young age), perhaps I learned via my parents teaching me...I dunno. But I'd think that you could successfully make the argument that teaching them to swim will allow them MORE of a childhood--as they'll safely be able to go to pool parties and such.<br><br>My wife and I are both adamant that our children will learn to swim at a young age as to avoid any tragedies.

I think that is crazy. I think you are actually doing a good job introducing the kid to water and allowing them to try and swim. I think there is a big difference between a water exposure class at 8 months old and having an 8 year old that has 3 different activities every night all week. I think you're doing a great job.

I certainly don't think there's anything wrong with getting your kid in the water or taking him to art classes. If you can afford it and you have the time to participate then more power to ya.<br><br>However, I do think it's possible to over schedule your child in activities. I think kids need downtime where nothing is planned as much as they need planned activities. I think balance is always important. Just because you CAN take them to 5 activities a week doesn't mean you should. I know for my toddlers if I take them out one day, then the next day they really need to rest and recoup. Otherwise I just end up with two very cranky kids, which isn't much fun for anyone.<br><br>And I'm sure you've figured this out already, but babies that age really find routines to be important. Their naps start to become very scheduled, they always eat at the same time, etc. I think it's important as a parent to respect the needs for your kid's routine and schedule our activities around them. And I know for us anyway, that would mean not planning to take part in anything like that until after they had dropped down to 1 nap per day. Before then it would have been just flat out too difficult to squeeze in an activity. That didn't happen for us until they were around 11 months old.<br><br>But keep in mind this is all coming from the mom of twins who pretty much didn't leave her house alone with her kids until after their first birthday.

Take him swimming! I was a water baby. I literally was one of those kids that twas in the pool and swimming before I could walk. I honestly don't remember learning to swim. It's just something that I could always do and I thank my parents for that.<br><br>Regardless of the activity I can't grasp how enrolling your son in a class and exposing him to new experiences can be translated as denying him a childhood.<br><br>That train of thought is just backwards.

I think you are doing your child a huge favor, and it's far easier for them to learn when their brain is super malleable. She is wrong. Though I grew up with a pool in the back yard and could get from one end of the pool to another, I was the model of inefficiency and I'd be huffing and puffing all the way. I've always had a bit of anxiety about swimming in a river or the ocean and it wasn't until I was in my 30's and wanted to run my first triathlon that I decided to take a proper swim class. I can tell you that it's a challenge learning to swim properly breathing techniques, body position etc. at my 'advanced age' 38. I have a lot of bad habits to unlearn. I learned to play the drums when I was young and it just 'comes naturally' to me. My wife learned to swim as a young child, and it seems to 'come naturally' to her. From the little I know about brain development, I am convinced that what we learn when our brains are still flexible gets imprinted better and faster and more permanently.

Good to know that we're all together. There have now been two classes for the kiddo. Basically they have the kids in the pool with a parent, in our case my wife, and do things just to teach the kids to be comfortable in the water. Duncan is the youngest in the class by nearly a year. But it's the older kids (it goes up to 3 years old) that tend to freak out.