A new start, A new Life, A new Family, a new place to live, A new chapter in the book of life. How must a man take it? When the man was a boy not even a year ago. Childhood teaches a kid some responsibility, and college even more. Tho it does not prepare you for the challenge of life and adulthood. It may be me, but i feel as if its stages of life all men go through. Its what weens out the boy from the man, or the father from the dad. Some guys collapse under the pressure of change and cant find it in themselves to pick themselves back up and keep going. Afraid of losing their childish and independent ways. Then they turn 30 and look around to see themselves as a failure, no kids, no family, no life. I know what these changes are like im going through them now. Some nights I get pissed at the world,depressed, almost to the point of no return, but thats a cowards way out. nothing teaches you nor experience can uphold the power of change. Its a giant mindscrew of emotions. I at 21 years of age am going through both the change from youth to man and from man to dad. Its hard but in the end it will be worth it. The best thing god gave man was faith, and I find it in him to push me through the toughest times of our lives. Yes, I said our because its not just I anymore. I guess to say the hardest thing is giving up your youth. especially if you never had it. I will make it through all the changes. Did you feel like this?

Hi Clarion,

If I'm reading your post correctly, it sounds like you are 21 years old and about to become a father, or recently became one. It also sounds as though you feel like you are losing something (your youth) by becoming a dad at such a young age.

I'm not sure how I would feel had I been in your shoes (I was 33 when I became a dad, a much different season of life than you are in), but please do not see fatherhood as though you are losing something.

On the contrary, you are gaining one of life's greatest joys: the love of your child. Nothing compares.

The most important thing you can do as a dad is to be there for your child. You won't regret it.

Jallanach is right. What you 'lose' is FAR FAR outweighed by what you gain...

And think of it this way too... when your child is 21, you'll only be 42... PLENTY of 'youth' left... Imagine relating to an 15 year old when you're only 36... I believe that's going to be MUCH easier than me dealing with one at 51 (my son is 3 now)...

The tricky part is going to be keeping your priorities straight. Yea, you're gonna miss those 20-something party times... But you MUST realize that they are unimportant in your new role as a parent. It'll be tough in the beginning, no doubt. But it will become clearer as your child grows. It's a different life for sure, but it's fantastic.