I’m a big believer in resolutions. I actually start thinking about New Year’s and its attendant do-overs about the time I start stealing the kids Halloween candy. As the holiday season gets cranked up into high-calorie gear, I start facilitating my pig out with all kinds of resolutions for the coming year. I also like benchmarks and hard targets and long term goals, and cling to the perverse belief that a person can actually change if he or she really wants to.
Now that the big meals are behind me (in so many ways), it’s time to get resolved.
Looking back at last year’s many resolutions for 2009, my belief in the possibility for change is suddenly drawn into question.
Finding a tradition for Coop and me was a total fail. Bubba had his fishing trip, and I (barely) got back in time to see the Nutcracker with Ri-ri, but still no definitive event with Coop. So re-up that as a resolution for 2010.
Creating more activities and keeping sports in balance were intertwined and a mixed bag. We juggled pretty effectively, and dropped one big extra-curricular, but life still felt slightly over-scheduled at times. I’d say the keeping activities in check needs to stay on the watch list for 2010, but no need for a full blown resolution.
College savings is not fully back on track. We are at least saving again, but I haven’t pulled the trigger on the auto-deduct monthly because of some fluctuations in the old DadLabs payroll. This resolution actually brings larger issues to bear. In short; 2010 will be make or break for DadLabs. Is that a resolution? Yes, I resolve to leave everything on the table for DadLabs in 2010.
Which is one reason I may not renew my resolution from last year to travel as little as possible. I may have succeeded too well on that one. I was not on the road more than once a month in 2009. Family vacation days outnumbered travel days. If we can afford it, that may have to come into closer parity in 2010.
Nurtureshock helped me understand that bringing arguments with your spouse through to a conclusion helps moderate the impact of discussions on the kids. Thanks a
Just a quick comment on the video: I am not a father, but am a single mother…however i just found this site and LOVE it. Great job and helpful to anyone who deals with kids in any capacity.
Anyway to the topic at hand, I wanted to respond to the question on whether or not a parent should cheat in the kid’s favor. I think Family game night is only as successful as the amount of fun everybody is having. If you are are on the receiving end of a butt whooping all the time…you aren’t going to have fun which means you won’t want to play anymore. While I don’t think you should cheat too frequently, a little give is good if it builds the esteem of your opponents. So, to my two boys PLEASE STOP KICKING MY ASS OK, give me a break already!!! So, have fun, but a little give is ok. Just don’t be a sucker. everybody has to learn to lose sometime.
That’s quite an ambitious list. I wish you the best of luck in achieving them.
Personally, I’m not a big fan of resolutions. Maybe I’m a pessimist, but when I go back to and review them, it always feels like my day-to-day “to do” list. Things never seem to go as planned and when it’s all said and done, I feel like I have a list of things that I failed to accomplish.
Having said that…after reading your list and giving 2009 some consideration, I am going to commit to some adjustments for 2010.
1) Start a monthly date night for my wife and I. There’s really no excuse. I have grandparents 8 miles down the road who adore our kids. There’s no reason they can’t have a monthly get together and the wife and I could have some quality time.
2) Get out on my new mountain bike at least 3 times a week. I’m not setting mileage goals yet. For now, the biggest challenge is making that time for myself a couple times a week to put my body in motion. Once I figure out what I’m capable of, I can start refining those goals.
3) Spend less time deliberating and commit to taking action sooner. I have a tendency of obsessing over decisions. I like to hold a situation up from every possible angle and consider different outcomes. At times, I end up “knowing” what the right decision is but I’ll put off taking action on it for ages, just reviewing the options. I need to just commit to a course and go for it.
I think those are some solid starting points for the new year.
Good luck with your goals and those runs! I did my first 5 miler with my brother back in March. Maybe that should be resolution number 4. To commit to 2 separate 5 milers in my area. That would double my productivity over last year. ;D Think I’ll make that one an “optional.”