Here’s the skinny on my afternoon and evening routine over the past two weeks:

Arrive at home, play with the kids, eat dinner, give baths, read books, tuck kids into bed, watch Democratic and Republican leaders give speeches about changing the world, go to sleep.

That’s been pretty much it. I did switch back and forth between the conventions and ESPN on Thursday nights to watch the Carolina Gamecocks lay big fat loser turds all over the field. But I digress.

Regardless of your political persuasion, I think you will agree with me on this. The most significant lesson that America learned during these historic conventions:

People clap way too freaking long for politicians when they are introduced. Give me a break, a seven minute ovation for the former Mayor of Moosejaw and five minutes of wild applause for a former Chief Executive who used tobacco products in ways other than was suggested by the manufacturer.

The crowd is going nuts and these people haven’t even said a word. What if their speech sucks?

Come on people, wait until they actually do or say something meaningful to praise them.

You don’t give your kids pudding before they eat their broccoli.

Rock the Vote.