In this week's episode of The Lounge, we pose an important question to the gathered panel of experienced parents - What was your child's favorite dangerous behavior? Listen to these moms and dads weigh in on their most treasured parenting nightmares. Self-destructive and danger was the way to go for their toddlers. DadLabs Ep. 310 The Lounge. Brought to you by One Step Ahead.

Daddy Brad: Welcome back to the tiniest bar in Texas, in beautiful downtown Austin. I’m Daddy Brad.

Daddy Clay: I’m Daddy Clay

Daddy Troy: And I’m Daddy Troy.

Daddy Troy: Yes he is Daddy Troy and this is the show we discuss important parenting topics with experienced parents. This show is brought to you by One Step Ahead, for all your important baby gear needs – they have got you covered every step of the way – One Step Ahead. Today’s question is?

Daddy Troy: What was your child’s favorite dangerous behavior? My son would climb up on top of things, I’d look up and he would be like 10 feet off the ground.

Daddy Brad: She loves to eat Deer poop. You know Deer poop is like little brown M&M’s.

Man 1: Any destructive tendencies yeah, they come from within.

Lady 1: Jumping on our couch, which was on a cement floor.

Lady 2: The day he walked out of the kitchen holding the ice-cream scoop and a knife and not a butter knife!

Man 2: I was at a party at my boss’s house once – we were next to a pool, my son crawled over and jumped in the pool – of course he couldn’t swim.

Man 3: Climbing on the edge of a wall, walking on the end of a dock – anything that involves falling onto water or hard surfaces.

Man 2: So I kind of looked at him and went “Oh my God!”

Daddy Brad: How about the Deer poop?

Man 2: He might be drowning.

Daddy Brad: Do they like to eat the Deer poop?

Man 2: And by the time my brain clicked to jump in or even think about jumping in the water…

Daddy Brad: And there’s lots of Deer poop in the world and there are lots of babies in the world.

Daddy Clay: You’re not supposed to talk about that – that’s gross!

Man 2: My boss’s wife had jumped into the pool and saved my son.

Daddy Brad: Deer poop? Do they eat the little?
Lady 2: No!

Man 1: She touched the stove once. We have an old stove and it gets hot – touched it once and that’s it.

Daddy Clay: I’m amazed! It seems to me that small children – toddlers in particular, boys especially are just absolutely bent on self-destruction.

Daddy Troy: One day my son was in a local grocery store and I caught him licking the counter. And when I looked up there, there was all this raw meat – it was at the butcher’s counter you know?

Daddy Clay: What’s so dangerous about licking the raw meat counter?

Man 2: He’s carrying a knife

Daddy Brad: So he’s up high with a knife?

Man 2: No he’s not that good.

Daddy Clay: Do they climb? Do these guys climb?

Lady 2: Yes! This is our professional climber in the family.

Daddy Brad: Does he need a cigarette?

Daddy Clay: Is there a formula that would describe the acceleration of a child towards a hardwood floor?

Man 2: Yes

Daddy Brad: Is there? What is it?

Man 2: You want to take their resistance into account?

Daddy Brad: Yes absolutely.

Man 2: That’s a non-linier term – I don’t really do that kind of math.

Daddy Brad: There’s Deer poop and babies and…

Daddy Clay: Just stop asking if other people that.

Daddy Brad: I just want to know.

Daddy Troy: Well, that’s all this week from the Lounge.

Daddy Clay: If you’ve got a particularly funny story about your child’s tendency to endanger themselves, please drop us a comment and as usual, you’ll be registered for our weekly giveaway – this week we’re giving away?
Daddy Brad: $100 gift certificate to One Step Ahead for baby proofing gear.

Daddy Clay: So thanks again to our sponsors One Step Ahead, best stores for your baby gear online, baby gear – One Step Ahead. See you next week.

Daddy Brad: Cheers