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How to Manage Your Safety Phobias

As a parent, do you have one particularly strong safety worry when it comes to your kids? Daddy Owen and Daddy Clay compare their fears for their children. From the hazards of cars and burns to food safety and choking and even falling in a toilet, it seems like most parents have one fear or anxiety that borders on phobia. Check out the video for more talk about child safety. DadLabs ep. 419.


Daddy Clay: Welcome back to the lounge I’m Daddy Clay.

Daddy Owen: And I’m Daddy Owen - filling in for Daddy Brad, who is on vacation trying to pigment his pasty, pasty body.

Daddy Clay: Well Daddy Brad, we hope you are having a good time there on vacation and thanks a lot Daddy Owen for stepping in.

Daddy Owen: Proud to.

Daddy Clay: I think most parents are pro-safety

Daddy Owen: Most

Daddy Clay: But I find that many parents - almost every parent, while they’ve got up to a broad concern for the safety of their children across the board - that there is always one or two issues, that just really, really get the anxiety amped up - that really just completely terrified of one specific or two specific things.

Daddy Owen: Yeah like that hot button, you got one - what’s yours?

Daddy Clay: I got a couple. One is very clearly - I’m afraid of cars. I mean for the children being run over. I mean I’m really scared of pedestrian/car interaction, with children. And it makes me just absolutely terrified I do weird things. I have to be careful how the kids get out the car at a parking lot, everybody has to hold my hand before they exit the vehicle, everybody has to be holding hands the whole time it’s embarrassing to me.

Daddy Owen: Everyone has to hold their hands before they get out of the vehicle?

Daddy Clay: Before they get out of the car they have to be there - they have to be in touch with me before they can get out of the car. And I will squeal awkwardly, if I see a child break away from the van in a parking lot or any.

Daddy Owen: Any child not even your own? like someone else’s child?

Daddy Clay: Yes it makes me cry.

Daddy Owen: Really? Can I hear the sound the squeal sounds? Wow, wow that’s a big one.

Daddy Clay: But I’m really afraid of that, and I think it’s legitimate. I mean these cars are big, like my kids cant watch that Pixar movie without weeping.

Daddy Owen: Bug’s Life?

Daddy Clay: No the car one - because I think I’ve scared them badly. and that’s bad. But that’s one is cars and the other one is I’m really paranoid about food safety. Yeah and it’s like raw meat, any vegetables all that has to be washed. Hands have to be washed and it’s pretty annoying, because I don’t actually do any cooking - I just I kind of stand behind my wife and I help her with that issue.

Daddy Owen: Wow so cars, and so drive-through’s must just freak your ass out it’s so awful.

Daddy Clay: So scary.

Daddy Owen: My two big ones - I’m really scared of burns, like I’m scared of an oven - Arden getting anywhere close, you know, if someone is cooking - she’s not allowed in there. She can not smoke unless I’m in the room and lighting the cigarette for her - I actually keep the lighter, I give it to her to light, and take it back and she has to ask for it again - unless she is going to chain smoke.

Daddy Clay: That’s actually true - I’ve seen him do it.

Daddy Owen: Yeah but you know it’s filter less, so we avoid all those chemicals. And the other thing is I get really scared of the toddler falling into the toilet bowl - not for drowning but just ick.

Daddy Clay: They make pieces of gear for that that will hold the potty closed - it’s a child safety. No it’s a little safety plastic thing that they put on the rim, and it holds the toilet and it’s a childproof lock.

Daddy Owen: We had one of those but I pissed the bathroom one too many times and.

Daddy Clay: I understand - it was also Owen proof. Well you know I also think is interesting about parental fear, is that if your in a marriage - my fear is stupid and her fear is totally well founded.

Daddy Owen: Yeah, your obsessive-compulsive holding hands n the parking lot fear is stupid.

Daddy Clay: The children are small and cars are big.

Daddy Owen: Well what is like your wife’s fear?

Daddy Clay: Well she’s got a chocking phobia such that, like all the food gets, she like dices it into little pieces, and then she puts it in the food processor and serves up like this whipped up steak becomes a whipped topping - that she serves to my son.

Daddy Owen: Well your son is old enough now he’s 10 years old.

Daddy Clay: Yeah and he is getting a little tired of the whipped topping steak.

Daddy Owen: I can imagine!

Daddy Clay: Yeah but she is totally crazy about that - about just making sure that everything is so small and just…

Daddy Owen: And that’s her obsession and she is like, your obsessions.

Daddy Clay: Why are you so stupid about this traffic thing? You are so crazy, but excuse me while I put the peas into the meat grinder. I mean she cuts up Popsicles.

Daddy Owen: It’s going to melt by the time you choke on it right? Isn’t that scientifically proven?

Daddy Clay: How does this?

Daddy Owen: Someone look that up? Jodi my wife - she’s got a fear of choking like grapes. She’s always cutting up the grapes and everything like that, and that fear and another fear of leaving the child alone with me and those two things kind of together.

Daddy Clay: Right well that I mean given the endorsement, child services I mean given the child protected services - I think that’s pretty legitimate.

Daddy Owen: I mean she’s got a case - I’m just saying lets not get obsessed.

Daddy Clay: We don’t have to get all legal about it.

Daddy Owen: Right exactly.

Daddy Clay: I think that it is very easy for you to have these one sort of spike and anxiety, and this one issue - and it can really effect the kids, if you have this one - because you know, I’m seeing my kids fearful of things that I’m afraid of. You have to be concerned about safety and security, but you have to like, even it out - there’s so many things to be worried about.

Daddy Owen: Oh it’s true you don’t want to neglect one of your other fears that could have turned into obsessions.

Daddy Clay: Right

Daddy Owen: They all deserve to be obsessions is that what you are saying?

Daddy Clay: Well no, you have an even dispersal of your anxiety over all the potential hazards to your kids.

Daddy Owen: But I mean like - you read the news. don’t you think like our fears are crazier then they’ve ever been?

Daddy Clay: I think that - do you read those things? There’s something in there about a hurt kid all the time.

Daddy Owen: I know it’s always and its awful and there is a video and I do read them.

Daddy Clay: Yeah I do too - I have to! they must be read. They simply must be read! and that I must obsess on being anxious about it.

Daddy Owen: And they have a video with like an empty swing swinging, and it’s like oh god because everything, everything is deadly.

Daddy Clay: If you have a particular anxiety or fear about your child’s safety - something that you really obsess about, like my cars what not - then once you go to dadlabs.com create a profile, join in the conversation there - I’ll start in the discussion forum as about what is your biggest parenting safety fear, and you guys can join us in conversation there. Daddy Owen is always on the site - you can friend him up, talk to him over there.

Daddy Owen: Yeah friend me out.

Daddy Clay: And talk to us about whatever is on your mind. that’s all for us this week here in the lounge.

Daddy Owen: I want to get friended up.

Daddy Clay: It’s just an expression - it’s like friend me up it’s like you know…

Daddy Owen: Come on and fill my space.

Daddy Clay: Be friendly in a dad way totally legit dad way.

Daddy Owen: Sure call me daddy.

Daddy Clay: No its not like - that its about safety and security.

Daddy Owen: I believe in safety.
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