This Lab concerns your little "nipper." Your little infant alligator. What to do when your cute baby goes all dental on you. Biting is an almost universal parenting problem. Watch to see how the DadLabs dudes deal when they get chomped by their children. What causes your toddlers to bite? How do other parents handle this? Also, learn about first aid for bites. DadLabs Ep. 7 The Lab.

DADDY BRAD: Kids may be cute, but watch out, because, after all, they are wild animals and they bite.

DADDY CLAY: Biting is something all parents have to deal with. At some point your kid will bite or get bitten or both. You’ll probably get chomped a time or two yourself.

DADDY BRAD: Biting is yet another reason why men should not breast feed.

DADDY CLAY: Dude, can you imagine? Those little baby teeth are sharp. Maybe we should rig up an experiment for ya there, nipple boy.

DADDY BRAD: Today, we’ll be talking about what to do when your cute little child goes all dental on your ass.

DADDY CLAY: This segment’s gonna bite.

DADDY BRAD: From the time infants get matching set of lower and upper teeth some time between four and seven months, biting becomes an issue.

DADDY CLAY: Is this because they are all evil little badger-children? Cannibals to be? No. Infants explore the world with their mouths. Biting is exploratory.

DADDY BRAD: Infants may also bite when they’re over stimulated. Because they are teething. Or even when they’re happy.

DADDY CLAY: They might get snuggled in and happy and just give you a little nip, just the tiniest bit of skin. And it might make you yell. But it’s normal.

DADDY BRAD: They can’t even really understand that they’re hurting you. But they can learn. A consistent and firm, “no” is enough. Then give them a frozen bagel, or a teething ring.

DADDY CLAY: I usually added an “Ow.” Now the thought may occur to you that you should teach the child what it feels like by biting him back. It sounds ridiculous in the cold light of day, but in the first point five seconds after you get the crap bitten out of you, it makes perfect sense. Don’t do it. It’s okay to have the thought. Wait five seconds, and it’ll be ridiculous again. Don’t do it.

DADDY BRAD: If infants bite to explore, toddlers bite to communicate.

DADDY CLAY: It’s a pretty powerful way to communicate, too. Things like, “that’s my damn Teddy Graham” or “you’ve been bigger than me just about long enough.” Biting is the great equalizer, wiping out gender and developmental inequalities.

DADDY BRAD: Just think about all the frustrations that toddlers are up against. Leaning to share, take turns, hold still, go to the potty. It’s no surprise they go Hannibal Lecter every once in a while.

DADDY CLAY: Some say biting is more prevalent in boys than girls, though I know some girls with lots of brothers that bit plenty. Overall, biting before age three is pretty normal and nothing to worry too much about. But that doesn’t mean it’s cool.

DADDY BRAD: So you’re on a playdate and everything’s going fine when suddenly junior’s latched onto his playmates forearm. How should you react?

DADDY CLAY: Always respond to biting immediately. Some parents will use a phrase like, “your mouth is for eating.” Some parents will then give all their attention to the bitten child, or ask the biter to help take care of the bitten child with “gentle touches.”

DADDY BRAD: Punishing violence with violence will probably just confuse the issue.

DADDY CLAY: So then there is the question of adults. How to deal? Now, if your kid bites another kid, that’s easy. You tell the other parents that their kid was asking for it and got what he deserved. But what to do when your kid is the one getting bitten?

DADDY BRAD: Really, the best thing is to not engage. Most day care centers have a policy not to tell the parents of the bitten child, who the biter was. This cuts down on conflict over normal behavior.

DADDY CLAY: Yeah, but the kid will usually tell you. They crack under a good interrogation. That or you can match the bite marks. Lots of little kids are snaggle-toothed or have those gaps.

DADDY BRAD: The only time you want to engage with other parents is if the biting becomes epidemic -- and this can happen, kids can copy each other. Then you may want to ask a teacher or center director to call a meeting to make sure everyone is acting accordingly and on the same page about responses.

DADDY CLAY: Good parents do not bite each other. Unless they’re married. In a nice way.

DADDY BRAD: Another thing to bear in mind if your child is bitten, make sure to treat the bite with antibiotic cream and a bandage. The human mouth is filthy.

DADDY CLAY: Biting is a pain. Nobody wants their kids to get hurt. Nobody wants to see their kids hurt other kids.

DADDY BRAD: But more than almost anything else in parenting, the cliche is true -- it’s just a phase.

DADDY CLAY: Be proactive, don’t sweat it too much, and this too shall pass.

DADDY BRAD: And always remember to floss. That’s all from us, here at the dadlabs.