Owen is happy to share his experiences wearing the empathy belly pregnancy simulator with just about anyone. Just ask the unfortunate salesman that happened by his door. Would you try to sell a Fit Pregnancy subscription to a pregnant man? DadLabs ep 491 is brought to you by BabyBjorn.

SALESMAN: Good morning, sir. I’ve just been walking around your beautiful neighborhood telling people about some wonderful opportunities for magazines and I was just wondering if I could – have a minute of your time.

OWEN: Whoa, my sciatica is killing me. I got to sit down. Come on in. So what’s your name again?

SALESMAN: Andrew.

OWEN: Andrew. Sorry I’m groggy. It’s hard to sleep when the iron balls are bouncing into your colon. Know what I mean?

SALESMAN: No. Not really.

OWEN: Hey, you want a beer? It’s my friend Troy’s house but he won’t mind. I’d join you but I’m not allowed to have beer while I’m pregnant. No beer, soft cheeses, no deli meats, no cocaine. I don’t do cocaine but now it’s not even an option.

SALESMAN: I’m selling magazine subscriptions and I just wanted to talk to you about just a few of the many –

OWEN: Whoa, hold that thought. I promised the wife I’d throw up once a day?

That was fun. Thank God for mouthwash. So what are you doing?

SALESMAN: I just wanted to talk to you for a minute about –

OWEN: You know it is amazing what the female body goes through to grow a baby. I mean there’s all kinds of changes, sensory changes, hormone stuff and the peeing. I pee every time I move. I peed, just now when I nodded. I peed just a little. You can feel it’s more humid in the room.

SALESMAN: Better Homes and Gardens isn’t just about Homes and Gardens –

OWEN: Whoa, you can feel it kicking. It’s moving. When I do this it moves! You gotta feel this. No really, feel this.

SALESMAN: No, sir.

OWEN: Put your hand there.

SALESMAN: I don’t want to feel anything.

OWEN: If you feel it one time I’ll join your church.

SALESMAN: It’s magazines, sir.

OWEN: Feel the baby, feel the fake baby! A little lower. You feel that?

SALESMAN: I’m freaking out a little, sir. Can I go?

OWEN: I was going to tell you about my mucus plug?

SALESMAN: Ok, I’m going to go.

OWEN: Don’t you want to tell me about your magazines…? Good baby…